|Finding a new laptop on your desk is a pretty neat thing to come home to!|
The world will never be joyful all at once. When I was 14, I wrote 16 pages that were meant to be my autobiography. I don't know why I thought I was important enough to write about myself. In hindsight, I'm glad I memoired about who I was then and how I saw myself (apart from providing me with humor, it has also provided my current 29 year old self with insight about my yesterdays). One of my aspirations as an ambitious 14 year old was to be a "professional happy maker". I was willing to do it for free if requited, and seeing the world a happier place was intended to be reward enough. I chose the paths I have to make the money I need (turns out willingness aside, I couldn't afford to do any of my jobs for free)...paths that would allow me to bring more joy to the world and leave the world a little happier, better, cleaner, more sustainable, more peaceful, more equitable, more empowered, and more just than the one I came into. I still aspire to do just that. It's not been easy and I don't suspect it will be.
It didn't take me long to understand that the world will never be joyful all at once. It's too vast: ripe with so much history, pumping with so much tumult, throbbing with so much love, overflowing with so much difference, beating with so much rage, churning with so much hope, and gleaming with so much creativity. It's impossible for every human, every living being, everywhere to be joyful all at once. You will come into a world with confused and confusing ideas about higher powers, energies, gods, no gods, and more. Whatever you decide and choose, I hope very much that you will come to that conclusion after careful deliberation and it will be a choice you can own and have chosen with as much freedom available to you (which I hope is boundless). (And remember, whatever you "choose" or "decide" on this matter, is yours and personal and doesn't have to be something you are born and die with). And whatever you decide to choose and believe, I hope it will guide you in better understanding our world and bridging gaps, not creating chasms; in forging loving bonds, not poisoning hearts; in building the constellations out of stars, not declustering the cosmos of life; in finding ways to be happy and spread joy...
Most days may not be joyful. Most people may not be joyful a lot of the time. That's okay too. You may have to edit your dreams sometimes. I wish you the wisdom to know when and the courage to know how. Some days though, you might need to keep your eyes open and ears perked up for small big surprises. They're often latent and lurking in places and moments you least expect to find them...
Like in your fridge, after a rough night.
Like in your shirt pocket, after a fight.
Like a snowflake on your nose, in May.
Like on your desk, after a long day.